I failed a class... well, whatever a D is.
But I'm done with grades now. My last year of college, I ended it with a 3.08.
Not the best, but I'm glad I didn't drop to a 2.something. I would have really hated that. But It would have been great to keep my 3.1. It was my fault for making poor decisions on choosing my minor and not trying hard enough. But that's fine. I knew I would fail that one class. It was really unavoidable. It was really hard and I was always asking for help. I chose a terrible minor. Linguistics, we just aren't meant to be together after all.
It's been a week now.
I'm tired of this shit already. I spent all day Wednesday creating my blog for HK, and I think I got it down right now. I made a header. It was hard to get the proportions right though and lots of trial and error occurred so it makes sense when I decided to make my Japan Exchange blog header yesterday morning that it was much faster to complete than it was Wednesday. If you'd like to take a look at both blogs, go for it. I have nothing written in my HK one yet though, I'll be starting on it sometime in August, and I'm gradually adding all my Japan Exchange blogs to this new one. I posted 13 yesterday, today I'm at 21. I'm tired of seeing Blogger in my tabs for the day.
natasha-in-hk-2012.blogspot.com
lovingjapan0809.blogspot.com
But I woke up this morning, ready to take a shower, and I stood to the side for a second and caught a glimpse of me through the mirror. My cabbage salads everyday for lunch are starting to show more. Did I mention my diet?
Breakfast: small bowl of cereal w/ soy milk.
Lunch: small tupperware full of cabbage salad I prepare for myself topped with diced veggies, egg, and chicken.
Dinner: unknown.
I recently started with half a can of tomato soup. But sometimes it's ramen. Most of the time I'm just too tired to bother and eat nothing.
Probably not good, and I'm not proud of that.
Yesterday I had a lot of fruit though that was left over from work (bubble&yogurt place) for supper.
But considering I realized I'm not going to make my goal by July 21st, the less I eat, the less electricity I use, the more money I can save.
I hate how my priority is something so artificial. I just keep telling myself, "it's only two months. Then it's all worth it."
Which is true. Not only because of the future, but what am I going to do with myself for two months anyway? Ah, who cares anyway. Cabbage is good for you. So is cereal. And all I have to think about is how people used to live way back when. Like hunters and gatherers. They couldn't find food all the time. Besides, food is a temptation. If anyone knows me, I eat like a horse. I DON'T STOP. So, this is good practice to stop eating so much. Luckily I didn't become as fat as I should be. Not that I'm fat anyway.
I've felt less hungry recently anyway. My body is either becoming adjusted to the change in calorie intake or well... I'm exhausted.
But two months.
Friday is the last day Aybun and his girlfriend will be at the apartment. Shigeru left Wednesday while Ruhi left on Monday. Then I'm alone. For good. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
the loneliness.
That's okay, I'll just learn to sleep at 11 or something instead of staying up till like.... 2am.
$9,000 new goal?
Never.
But more attainable.
128lbs?
It's happening.
I'm trying to speak Chinese at work sometimes too at the yogurt&bubble tea place. I don't remember that many words but it's fun to try and make concrete sentences. They always correct me too. Yesterday I tried to say "there's a lot in that bowl." I came out with "那个碗太了", but I forgot the "多". So she didn't understand me at all hahaa. At least the four hours go fast there unlike at the clothing store and... campus. The days are moving fast though. Before I know it, it'll be July. Then I'll only have three weeks left of Albany and working. The days are going fast just because I am so busy. The day I can be 'home' and sit outside with my dog.... no, I want to take her for a walk every morning. The month I can walk my dog every morning, that sounds... nice. I won't want to be home, but I'll want to get out as much as possible because I can't be trapped there again like I usually am. It's not like they keep me there, but there really is nothing to do since I don't drive and well.... like I said in my last two blogs... I don't have friends back home anymore. So, going home doesn't have a purpose for me in reality.
I'm a traveler.
Friends don't tend to stick around....
and speaking of that....
I had a dream about her two nights ago. We were all happy and just having fun with other people too. But I haven't heard anything from her at all. I feel like she parted from everyone. And I was afraid to ask my other friend because... last time I did, it really did seem like some kind of hatred was there. And I don't want to make it seem like I favor one over the other....
I want to send her an email asking if she got my letter. But I was afraid that I'm being too annoying. And I don't want to be annoying to her. It'll just make me seem desperate. But we... I don't understand. How long ago did I send her that NYC snow globe? Wasn't it like, four months ago...? But this is just so sudden. I had a dream that I saw her again in Japan though. They say when you dream about people it just means that you miss them a lot. It doesn't have any future predictions. So I sent another email anyway yesterday afternoon, wondering if she received my letter. I really do miss her.
Then just before I went to sleep yesterday, I checked my email and she actually wrote back! I was so happy, because that means everything is okay and stuff. It was such a relief and she said she was so happy to get my letter too... but as I remember what I wrote... it was such a terrible "お久しぶり" letter. Because I seemed so sad and confused in it. But she's writing me back! I'm so excited! It's been awhile since my last foreign letter (other than Connie's postcard which I love so much too), another to add to the box! I'm really really happy. :) :) :) :)
ios 5.1.1 untethered came out today!! I've been waiting forever for the damn thing. I need to have Anki on my itouch :( Easier to study. yayyyyy!!!!
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